Hush
by mrpoohbear
Summary: what if seth and ryan really were brothers? some things would remain the same, some things would change
1. Default Chapter

Kirsten Cohen's happiest moment was when she finally beheld, sweaty and trembling from the exertion of the pregnancy, her two babies tied to her by blood and love.  
  
One bawled like his life depended on it. His tiny throat worked feverishly to announce his entrance into the world. The other was quiet, the silence of an immediately introspective personality.  
  
Sandy looked at his two children, speechless. Only once had his voice failed him before during Kirsten's pert yes to his proposal of marriage. The adoration in the two parents' eyes found kindred feelings as they glanced at each other, awed at the responsibility placed before them.  
  
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When they were little, Seth and Ryan were inseparable. A darkly colored curled mass of hair would be trailed by a sandy blond mop. Seth often tripped due to the tendency of his mind to be thinking of something else than directing ungainly legs. Ryan would quickly dart in to steady his brother, providing a solid support for his clumsy partner in crime.  
  
When they played in the sandbox, little girls would often bashfully ask Ryan to build them a castle. His cheeks burning a fierce red, Ryan would make sure that there was a girl paying attention to Seth too. Otherwise, he would wistfully decline the request.  
  
When they excitedly and fearfully (at least for Seth) slashed their fingers for blood to perform the sacred blood ritual of brotherhood, it was Seth who jumped up and down wincing and proclaiming his pain in loud tones to the public. Ryan stood stock still, a smirk fighting to spill onto his face. When they finally touched fingers, however, there was nothing but serious resolution on both their faces for a few moments before Seth promptly pretended to faint from blood loss.  
  
When Kirsten looked fondly at her two children one morning at breakfast, she saw two different colored pairs of eyes but only one pair of brothers who loved each other very much. Their seventh birthday was coming up, and she wanted to make sure that they had the best time possible.  
  
Later that day at the mall, she had to smile as Seth pretended to be Tom Hanks after watching the movie "Big" while Ryan, amused, shrank even more to accentuate the fact that he was the shorter sibling. With her returning part-time to her career, she did not have as much time to spend with them. As her attention wandered for a moment at the toy shop, she noticed Seth by himself looking avidly at a Batman and Robin collector set.  
  
"Seth, where is your brother?" she asked almost reflexively.  
  
"Mom, he... I don't know. I ran to look at these toys," replied Seth innocently.  
  
An hour later, a distraught Kirsten sat on a bench tightly clenching the hand of Seth. Tears seeped out of Seth's eyes, and even she felt cold despair envelop her. Ryan was gone, lost in a heartbeat. 


	2. chapter 2

The first thing that Ryan noticed about the woman was the abundance of fine lines on her forehead. His mother, still youthful, had some lines that bespoke resolution and thoughtfulness. This woman was old. Despite her hair being a shiny metallic yellow, those lines seemed acid-etched, a cruel job of marking something permanent on a skin canvas.  
  
The woman had tripped on her heels, sending her crashing into Ryan. Dragging a little behind his family to look at some soccer balls, Ryan was abruptly pulled to the ground.

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_"Seth!"  
  
As Seth's taller but lanky body fell on his own, Ryan twisted desperately to cushion his brother. A moment later, Ryan felt the searing pain of bones twisting jarringly out of place. A skateboard skittered to the ground.  
  
"Oh no! Ryan... I'm so sorry," cried Seth as he hurriedly leapt off of Ryan.  
  
The damage was done though. Ryan slowly stood up with Seth's trembling aid. His left arm dangled uselessly.  
  
"Don't worry about it, Seth," hissed Ryan in pain even as he began to smile crookedly, "It'll get better. Besides, I didn't want to hurt that hair of yours."  
  
His hands involuntarily going up to check his "do", Seth guiltily replied, "I should have been more careful. I'll do all of your chores this week. I'll do your homework. I'll even play the Super Nintendo for you."  
  
Despite the pain, Ryan had to chuckle at his brother's ability to turn anything into comedy, intentionally or not.  
_

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"Shit. I'm so sorry... You're just a kid," murmured the woman as she glanced at first apologetically and then intensely at Ryan.  
  
"That's ok. Are you sure you're ok?" asked Ryan hesitantly.  
  
The woman continued to stare at Ryan without replying. Ryan was surprised to find himself looking at bluish eyes about the same shade as his own. Blue was usually his favorite color. It reminded him of the ocean, vast and bottomless. Water sometimes crystal clear, piercing the deepest depths. Water sometimes murky, hiding the deepest secrets.  
  
The woman shook herself as if coming out of a deep reverie.  
  
"Sorry for bumping into you. I'm just in such a hurry. My family is waiting for me at the parking lot. Say, would you like an ice cream cone? It will be my treat since I fell on you," said the woman in a bright voice.  
  
Ryan considered the offer carefully. Usually, his mother would forbid them from going off with strangers. However, there was something about this woman. Her clothes were largely clean, but he could tell that they had been patched up. Her makeup was just a little too obvious, unlike the delicate play of colors that resulted from his mother's meticulous application. She had a nice face, he decided. A little worn out but still pleasant.

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_Ryan stopped near the bundle of rags, curious by the snoring coming from it.  
  
"Ryan, just ignore that," exclaimed Kirsten impatiently. They were waiting for a cab after having gone to a fancy restaurant for dinner.  
  
Seth, always one to poke his nose into something his brother found interesting, asked his mother why they should ignore the spectacle.  
  
"It's just a beggar. You never know these days. Some of them make more money than you can imagine and make a living just fleecing people who are kind enough to give them something," stated Kirsten.  
  
Kirsten and Seth began to head toward a cab that had just pulled up. Ryan, an emotion rising in himself that he could not quite place, placed a ten dollar bill that his mother had given him earlier that week for snacks near the sleeping form, keeping it there with a small stone. He rose and joined his family.  
_

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"Sure. But I have to be back soon," agreed Ryan cautiously.  
  
"No problem. I just want to properly apologize," replied the woman.  
  
"My name is Ryan Cohen," offered Ryan, "What is your name?"  
  
"My name..." mused the woman, "My parents christened me Ellie when I was born. But, my first husband never liked that name. I changed it to please him."  
  
A strange smile appeared on her lips. At once, she seemed to want to cry and laugh.  
  
"Dawn. My name is Dawn. He used to say that I reminded him of the dawn." 


	3. chapter 3

Note: Response to queries: This takes place when Ryan and Seth are nearly 7 years old. The stuff in italics represent flashbacks, mostly to flesh out the scenes and add some more detail to the background.

chapter 3

Toying with the stem of the cherry that came on top of his sundae, Ryan glanced nervously at Dawn. She had aroused an indefinable but indelible impression on him. Here was someone who did not glitter, shine with the reflection of wealth. Throughout his life, the concept of money had never been a concern.  
  
"Hey, kid. I was wondering... What do your parents do? Since you obviously have money, considering your clothes," asked Dawn with a glint in her eyes. She had come to the mall for a sale on blue jeans for her son. Just seeing this kid made her realize that a world of difference separated Sears and Abercrombie even though the stores were only 20 feet apart.  
  
Ryan blushed as he looked down at his Abercrombie ensemble.

* * *

_"What is this place, Kirsten? Are you sure that this isn't the male version of Victoria's Secret?" teased Sandy as he surveyed the rather explicit pictures on display at the Abercrombie store.  
  
"Sandy! This is one of the most popular apparel places these days. Even though I admit that the models in those flimsy underpants do look a bit overwhelming," scolded Kirsten.  
  
Seth laughed out loud at his mom's choice of words. This store did not appeal to him. After all, what were shirts good for besides to display an easily visible message, written or symbolic? One of his favorite shirts, for example, had a picture of a Smurf along with the caption, "Hug me till I'm blue".  
  
"Dad. You know that Ryan has to shop here since he's so popular with the girls. I mean, he was the first boy that Marissa decided didn't have cooties. Besides, he's the athlete in the family. I got most of your Jewish genes," snickered Seth.  
  
Ryan shot Seth a death glare but was too embarrassed to complain. His mom usually picked out his clothes while respecting his preference for a plain style.  
  
"I remember when Abercrombie was a store for old-timers. Things have really changed. Oh well, as long as you are footing the bill, Kirsten. I'm afraid that a public defender's salary does not cover $50 jeans," chuckled Sandy.  
_

* * *

"My dad is a lawyer. My mom works for my grandfather at the Newport Group," replied Ryan.  
  
"So, your parents must work in big offices with people to make them coffee every morning, huh? Must be something fancy like French Roast, not like Harvest Blend," questioned Dawn.  
  
"My mom has an office like that. My dad doesn't. He likes to tease mom by saying that she sold out to the man. Seth, that's my brother, usually asks whether the man is like Mr. Scrooge from Duck Tales. Dad then laughs uncontrollably and says that he always figured Caleb, that's my grandfather, had a giant money pit. Mom tries to hide a smile while still shouting SANDY, that's my dad's name, really loud," explained Ryan.  
  
"Are you close with your brother?" queried Dawn, finding a strange kind of solace in the kid's refreshing honesty.  
  
"I guess. Since we were born on the same day, my parents always have to give us an equal number of presents so that Seth or I won't feel bad. On our fifth birthday, my mom accidentally gave Seth one more present. Seth felt that was unfair so he decided to give the entire birthday cake to me. Of course, that meant I would later give him half anyway since we share everything, but it was the thought that counted," mused Ryan.  
  
Dawn caught herself wishing that her son had a companion like this boy. Trey had grown up having to share without anybody sharing with him. A small difference, but one that made him a little harder than she wanted...  
  
"Do you have a son or daughter? You look like you do. My mom always says that you can tell who has children because you can see the tiredness in their eyes from waking up eight times a night for years. Mom said that I shouldn't tell Seth, but he managed to scream so loudly all the time that she was considering whether to install a permanent pacifier," inquired Ryan shyly.  
  
Dawn had to smile at the matter-of-fact tone of the kid. She had no knowledge about the dynamics of his family or a detailed understanding of the personalities involved. However, she could sense that this kid loved them all. In the simple act of naming them, he instilled a sense of permanency and trust in belonging to a family.  
  
"I have one son. His name is Trey. Actually, he is about your age, I think. Although, he is a bit taller. But still... You almost look like brothers, "murmured Dawn.  
  
Ryan felt surprise along with a twinge of unease. Her comment dredged up some memories where he and Seth had been questioned about how they could look so different yet were still brothers.

* * *

_Luke and some of his hulking friends watched Ryan and Seth walk to class.  
  
"Look who's coming down the hall. Two...pansy fairies!" exclaimed Luke. He felt proud using an insult that he had heard from a water polo player at Harbor earlier that week.  
  
Seth, feeling words come out of his mouth before he could think, retorted, "And that would make you the Queen, wouldn't it!"  
  
"What did you say?" yelled Luke, "I will break you, bitch!"  
  
Just as things looked like they would end badly, Ryan stepped in front of his brother. Truthfully, Luke was a little scared of Ryan. Although smaller, the other boy had an unbreakable quality to him, a desire to protect his brother that ignored the limitations of flesh.  
  
The first time they had tangled, Luke had emerged victorious...with a broken nose and masses of bruises. Ryan had not fared much better with a dislocated shoulder and a scar near the temple that would never heal. Out of that fight, Luke learned one thing. You pushed Ryan Cohen, he would not back down. You pushed his family, you would get hurt until you never wanted to mess with his loved ones again.  
  
"Well, at least my brothers and I don't look...like a mismatched pair of freaks," growled Luke as he hurried away, not willing to risk another fight.  
  
Seth spluttered as he took in the insult.  
  
"Is he trying to make fun of us? Mismatched... Ry?" asked Seth going from fury to sudden apprehension, "You're my brother no matter what, right?"  
  
Ryan could only smile. Although he usually disliked public displays of, well, anything, he reached to hug his brother.  
  
"Don't worry, Seth. You'll be bothering me with your crazy ability to talk as fast as a hummingbird flaps its wings well until we're both old. You just inherited more of dad's genes, while I took more of mom's," replied Ryan.  
  
As the taller boy hugged tightly back, he swallowed his irrational fear.  
  
"Ry? At least I inherited the cool hair," laughed Seth._

* * *

Staring intently at Ryan, Dawn missed seeing a brawny man wearing jeans and a flannel shirt barge in the ice cream shop and come directly at her.  
  
"Dawn, where's my money, bitch!" roared the man.  
  
With a cry of "No! Pete!", Dawn was pulled to the floor by a massive slap from Pete. 


End file.
